It’s Nothing Like a Phenomenon

it's barely revolutionary

I find myself at odds explaining my work, process, or understanding the world that informs it all. I, at times, don't quite know what I want my work to say. Then, in the heat of the moment, I know. As I am working, paint under my fingernails, sweat on the brow, eyes shifting from source material to painting, I see it all. I just don't know if it is as right as I feel it is, in the moment. I'm rambling. So let me get to the point. What I have come realize is, as I believe to be indicative of most artists is, I have a fascination with people, emotion. The audacity for people to exist and how little they seem to be aware of how precious life truly is. This idea that, through the commonality of life itself, we are within reason in missing the complexities or subtleties of each other on a whole. I am really looking to challenge my own unique ability to rationalize people down to a type. That, based off common traits that streak throughout mankind, I can determine what kind of person I am dealing with. I speak to this in the present tense, but, in a third person perspective, because I fully understand the issue and without lax, continue to perpetuate this fundamentally debilitating practice to this day. Women are primarily the subject in my work. It's more than my attraction to the opposite sex. It's more the prospect of connection, a need to understand. I have missed out on a lot, in my childhood, having to hide emotions, lashing out because I didn't get it. I was brought up in the fog of the patriarchy. Women were their own and not. So they were all characters, in a story that starred me and the support being the male friends in my life. I was shy, but always approachable. I could hold a conversation for days and valued interaction. This created openings, but the misunderstanding always left me lacking. What was it I desired, what was I wanted, what was it I didn't understand. So my work is me dealing with this perception I grew up with. Seeing these women in this way creates a point of reference. I photograph, then paint, and in the process, I carefully choose a picture that best describe the woman I was just photographing. You see, in my shoots we talk, I ask questions and I get life stories, or close to that. I open up to help them open up. I typically feel myself most exposed but I believe that is necessary. It is necessary to be stripped as so the models understand who they are working with. I don't say "know," because there is very little to "know" of a person when only touching on their exploits. I don't expose the emotional rationale behind all my life decisions, but I offer enough to make a compelling topical tale. In choosing a picture that best describes the model, it says more about me than them. It explains more to me than it would to the viewer. As like with most artists, I want my work to be deciphered differently, depending on the viewer. For me, my work is combative to my psyche. I depict my definition of these women so that I know that, that is just one of many dimensions. I document the side I know, so that I don't keep that hanging in the annals that are my interaction with this human being. Almost like I shelf that side so that I can consider all the others. So beyond a carnal attraction, there is an emotional devolution on my part to the possibilities. There is a dissemination of the character that can now take place because I got out of the way the one version of them I believed them to be. My statement for work like this is, I create the version of the subject I define them as, to move that version her out of the way, in order to see the rest. These moments depicted are just that, moments.

The Power of Flora

and turning over a new leaf

Never mind that title. I am literally winging it here. I do like to write though. I have written a bit in my life. I guess this is my new "journal." With that said, let me explain to you my love for art. It started when I was... wait, you can read most of that in the about me? Oh ok then, jumping ahead. My love for art and all things creative has led me to posting about the exhibits at the National Botanical Garden, here in Washington DC. Be it I have been a native of the area since birth, you would think, why would you be so excited about an exhibition in a museum space you could have frequented for years. We'll that shows how much you know because I never go out, so there. No, I lie, I am out . This was no different. But, I do not regularly take in all the sights that DC has to offer. I am a passive native, I am out, but I am out doing regular people shit, like drinking, walking, eating, walking, visiting friends, and typically walking to do so. Sidetracked! So, at the National Botanical Garden, there are a few exhibits running through he holiday season. Ending on the 3rd of January, you have the christmas trees, the trains, and these beautifully crafted national buildings and houses, figured out of plant life and natural material. Lets start with the trees, as an observer, I enjoyed as any spectator would, the festivity of their inclusion. I did not read much into the decoration or meaning, as I believed, was not the aim behind them. There was an all white one with woodland creatures abound, then another that was a little more traditional, toned down and recognizable. They were great and all, but, the draw was the massive tree in the room to the right (probably owning a greater name). This tree, was huge, garish, and impressive. Not National Tree impressive, but impressive none the less. Like a great dismount impressive. The ornaments were abundant. Something that would send any Christmas enthusiast over the moon. I stood in front of this thing imagining the bodies that had to inhabit it for hours to make sure everything was in place; the wires were handled, the decorations evenly distributed, all points accounted for. I mean the ornaments, in some places, played through the pines needles as if hiding from the spectators. You would be hard pressed to find a bare spot. I was pretty awed by this thing. it may speak to a lack of Christmas spirit I exhibited growing up. That's an other story.   IMG_0173 IMG_0179   Then the well crafted train track, lined with a floral arrangement that rivaled none. I mean it was so thick, the thing looked rooted. Thomas the tank Engine replica, greeted the children as they marveled at the spectacle and took in the sight, with their hands. Last were these incredibly sculpted houses, about the arrangement, like little families owned real estate in some of the most beautiful forests on the east coast. I'm saying like I got so close to these things, I was practically one with them, trying to figure out the materials used. They look as solid as anything I have ever seen and the attention to detail was mind-boggling. I am an artist all about my detail, but this houses just seemed to solidify this testament that I am not that great. Don't take my word for it though, I am a harsh critic of my work. These houses though, they were like the appetizer to the National Buildings built out of the same material.   IMG_0131 IMG_0129 IMG_0120   All the hits were accounted for; The Castle, The Library of Congress, The Supreme Court building, even The US Capitol. I am not typically in awe of the buildings I have neighbored all my life, but in this form, they were, for lack of a better word, dope. I mean these things were hand crafted. Leaves were pressed to create these great wall textures and colors. A sand or dirt like material was compacted to create roofs and foundation. The stick columns and corners, the see through windows, then the mass like grass additions. I loved seeing these buildings displayed this way. I mean, they even had lights! there was electricity in these things. Great work to the contributing artist(s). As I come to a close here, I needed to get to speaking on my favorite room win the building. It was being called "the trains" by the children running about. I call it the "Save the Bees" show. So small, but gorgeous. A little inspiring to see that many colors in one space and it work.   IMG_0137   I wish I had taken more photos to support my claims. The trains were a draw, they ran everywhere. The room was dancing, as the trains weaved through out the display. This display filled the room and so did the creations. Bats, birds, bees, and little goblins, all crafted out of plant, or plant-like material. Colors were rich, and the details were heavy. It took a few passes to get what I missed and still I feel as though I left without taking it all in. Being able to digest art like this is a commodity in this day in age. Just being in the moment instead of attempting to document it. I say all of that, to say this. GO TO THIS EXHIBIT, enjoy it. The bees even have a look into their lives, if they lived... like us.   IMG_0148 IMG_0153   Save the Bees.

It’s Been Awhile

and other title ideas that share a name with early 2000's semi-hits

It's been a while since I have done this, blogging. I have not blogged in something like 7-8 years now. I'm something like a relic to the medium; be it that I adopted it early to very little fanfare, just to return to it with even less recognition and a little aged. The perspective has changed, and so have the aims. I just need something to keep record. I have not been doing well with documenting my work, my process, or my life, as a whole. Moments and opportunities come and go, blurring as I age and I start to realize, I have very little to recall. My memory ain't so bad, I can admit it isn't the greatest. It just helps to have a recording. Even if this serves as nothing more than a place to house random thoughts and chance happenings. Kourtney   I'm an artist, one of the slightly narcissistic breed that lacks the gene for self aggrandizing. My humility, a darned thing, stems from the idea that there is always someone better. So I can be rather introspective at times and over think a large portion of things that ask very little of me. It's not crippling and I don't allow it to prevent me from doing much. I just, keep it in mind, because I know it informs my life decisions. Currently taped to my drawing table is a smaller painting, created from the images taken for a larger project. It's an interesting thing, creating. Honestly, just creating, no matter the process, it's an incredible feeling. Her name, the subject, is Kourtney. The work, well, it's the same, Kourtney. A study of sorts, because I painted a larger work, that for some reason, bothered me to no end. Well, what this piece has reveled are shortcomings of the larger work. Helped me with problem areas, and cultivate techniques to push some of the elements like highlights and alter tones in her complexion. It's been an education. Kourtney detail This has been my first post. I am sure with time, and effort, I will grow and so will my writing here. In the meantime, I'll have to rely on the photos to keep anyone who wanders here, interested.